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    Round 6 Match Thread

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    Honeysett
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    Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Honeysett on Wed Apr 06, 2016 11:37 pm

    Honeysett's Round 6 Match Thread



    In patches they’ve looked like premiership favourites, in patches they’ve looked like the special ed bus. The Broncos will need to find the consistency that took them to the grand final soon before Origin silly season rolls around or they could find themselves struggling to make the top 2. Their football looks like they’re still shattered about the GF loss. Barge Ass Jr in particularly needs to channel his inner Taylor Swift and Shake It Off, looks half the player he was last year, including his previously thick child baring hips. Luckily they play the worst attacking team in the competition. There’s been better looking attacks at an Eagles of Death Metal concert. Too soon? Fuck off it’s a joke. The Dragons will need something, with attack stuttering worse than Jimmy Valmer it needs to improve fast and it needs to improve soon. Mary likes that old school brand of football which doesn’t work well in the NRL of today. Mary and their fans will need to get in the here and now, I’m looking at you fuckwit that still has the GST sign. It wasn’t funny when GST first came in and it’s still not funny now. If the Broncos don’t win this one by 13+ it’s because they fielded 7 players and only won by 12.

    FTS Oates
    Broncos by 26



    You could be forgiven for thinking you’re watching a rerun of Groundhog Day with this game being played only 5 weeks earlier. This should never happen in a professional sport, hopefully one day the NRL goes professional and we can avoid this bush league. Unfortunately for the Roosters Bill Murray won’t be there to make this one entertaining and they’ll be on the receiving end of another pasting. Don’t be surprised to see the same scoreline this time. Rumours are a buzz that Adam Reynolds will make a comeback, comeback in the sense of Heath Ledger in “A Knights Tale” and less in the sense of “Brokeback Mountain” There’s nothing to suggest that the Roosters can turn this around, they’ve looked leaderless and playing with as much passion as a sad hand job. These matches are generally pretty entertaining but the Roosters look a shell of their former selves. Rabbits by plenty.

    FTS Goodwin
    Rabbits by 20.



    The future NSW halves put on a great display to take the points off the Dogs at Belmore, if they can bottle that up they’ll go along way into the 8 this year. They’re my smokies for top 4 and even potentially a surprise Steven Bradbury type premiership. This should be a great game between two surprise packets, like when a hottie wears a jacket all night and takes it off to surprise with banging double Ds. This is my game of the round has the potential to be an absolute ball tearer. The Eels let the win slip right through their.. whatever Eels have, I was going to say hands but judging by Guthersons display with the line wide open on several occasions I think hands may be the wrong word. Brad Takairangi, apart from having to google the spelling of his own name is sporting one of the worst hairstyles in football so that right hand edge is on the shit list this week, it’s not surprising the Eels don’t attack much down the right side he’s fucking hard to look at.

    FTS Semi
    Eels by 4



    Dylan Walker at 6? Please. He’s the worst 6 I’ve seen since the one I bedded last weekend. Word to the wise, they might look real nice all dolled up in their wedding get up but after 20+ beers that 6 isn’t the 10 you thought it was, she called me Shaun and I won’t call her ever again. Where was I? Oh right DW - shift him to centre where he’s one of the most dangerous ball runners around and get someone in that can lead the team around properly. He’s learnt the crab across field well from DCE, watch him go to the learn and throw a fake pass to his right hand time and time again. If I was the opposition I would line him up like he was cocaine and I was Keith Richards, smash the cunt. It took the Warriors and RTS till Golden Point to look like a threatening football side this year, but let’s be honest it was against the Roosters and it wasn’t pretty to watch, like a water birth. It could and should be the game that kicks them into gear, they’re a confidence team if ever was one and they’ll need every bit of that to get their season back on track. SJ and RTS will continue to gel and should put away the lads from the Northern Beaches. Don’t be surprised if you go to the fridge more often than not to get a few top ups to make this one entertaining.

    FTS Matulino
    Warriors by 10



    Bryce Cartwright got the Panthers the win in the dying seconds last week there’s no two ways about it. He continues to imploy his Rocks and Diamonds football which would stress out a stoner. Talks of him being in NSW contention are as premature as my first time (to a Linkin Park album and I didn’t even make it to the chorus) He’s so green I’ve heard Snoop Dogg tried to smoke him. I thought I read that Seggy could be back this week, I don’t know if that’s right but could be interesting against the club he left that went on to win a premiership. There’s no reason to think that the Panthers can win this game, they’re at long odds and should be longer (the number one wish from your wives or the twos that SI pulls) The Cowboys and JT pulled the pants down of the Dragons and gave them a massive touch up and I wouldn’t be surprised to see this one go the same way. It’ll be close for the first 60 and they’ll fall off and the boys from Townsville will pile it on, just like a missus that you finally put a ring on. No wonder you boys drink to forget.

    FTS Winterstein
    Cowboys by 18



    Battle of the Bruise Brothers. Bird V Gallen, this game will come down to what one of them can pull off the best victim face first. They're the type of blokes to fart and looked appalled at everyone else in the room for the smell. If they were women they’d be sporting the “I want to speak to the manager” haircut. More bitching and moaning than the missus while Aunt Flow is in town. The two do more whaling than Japan does off our shores. They’re cunts is what I’m saying. Put them in sky blue and they’re my kinda cunt but for now they’re pieces of shit who I want to see smashed in a tackle. I’m really shocking by how well the Titans have played this year, they’ve been so impressive even in their losses and I don’t think that will change this game. Sharks have looked alright and have done enough to get over the line most weeks, it’s all there for them they just need to put the pieces in place. Fifita looks in career best form and if he can stay away from his personality will find himself in a Blues jersey in two months. I think this one will be entertaining in the same way seeing two midgets fight, good for a quick glance but anything longer is just cruel.

    FTS Bird
    Sharks by 6.



    What a difference a few weeks make, the Tigers looked like they could beat anyone and everyone and the Knights looked like they couldn’t beat under 7s. Now they both look like they couldn’t beat themselves. A nice happy medium for both teams. The Knights were surprisingly resilient against the Storm and impressed the few fans that have stuck by them this year. That being said their biggest weakness is the biggest strength of the Tigers, spread them wide and score. Sounds like the advice I give my bitches. I’m hoping the Knights can get the W here, I’ve got a bet with my Tigpie loving sister and I really don’t want to be shouting Nandos this weekend. Tigers have looked pretty average the last few weeks, I don’t want to blame one person but it coincides with a certain trouble making number 9 coming back into the side. Perhaps JT was right and he should have been ditched a long time ago - hell even a broken clock is right twice a day. I’m going to tip the Knights in this one, get my order ready sister: Surpremo All In The Burger, Peri Peri chips and a Little Creatures Pale Ale… oh and Perinaise Chip Dip, bitch.

    FTS Teddy
    Knights by 2



    Old mate Josh Reynolds made the headlines on Monday for a stray finger, I don’t know what the big deal is I’ve had a few ladies try the ole stinky pinky mid blowie - not bad if done right. The Dogs on Monday night went down with Reynolds walking around with a pinky that’s brown. The grand final rematch of 2014 is a tight battle majority of the time which should suit the Bulldogs who like to use their bruising forwards to bash through the middle and control the tempo of the game. The Storm looked real clunky against the Knights and barely escaped with a victory despite being at home, they got the win on the back of a try with more obstruction than four days of constipation. Both teams will need to improve tenfold if they’re going to win this one. Monday night promises to be a real cracker, very rare you get two teams of this quality in a game like this. I’m going to tip an 80 minute draw with Mbye slotting the 1 point to break the Storms hearts.

    FTS Koro
    Dogs by 1



    Last edited by Honeysett on Thu Apr 07, 2016 12:07 am; edited 1 time in total
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    Welshy
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Welshy on Wed Apr 06, 2016 11:54 pm

    Favourite part of my FF week reading these mate!
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    SI
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by SI on Wed Apr 06, 2016 11:58 pm

    "They're cunts is what I'm saying"

    Lol

    Oh, and they don't even have to be a "2" for me.

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    Mighty Fishes
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Mighty Fishes on Thu Apr 07, 2016 12:06 am

    You're tipping a one point win by M'bye but the dogs to win by 4? Haha sorry being picky its a fucking awesome read as always! They should have this on nrl.com I might actually visit the site then
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    Honeysett
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Honeysett on Thu Apr 07, 2016 12:07 am

    Welshy wrote:Favourite part of my FF week reading these mate!

    Favourite part of mine is waking up the next morning and reading the comments and seeing who liked it.
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    Honeysett
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Honeysett on Thu Apr 07, 2016 12:08 am

    Mighty Fishes wrote:You're tipping a one point win by M'bye but the dogs to win by 4? Haha sorry being picky its a fucking awesome read as always! They should have this on nrl.com I might actually visit the site then

    Fixed up thanks mate haha.
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    SI
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by SI on Thu Apr 07, 2016 12:09 am

    Honeysett wrote:
    Mighty Fishes wrote:You're tipping a one point win by M'bye but the dogs to win by 4? Haha sorry being picky its a fucking awesome read as always! They should have this on nrl.com I might actually visit the site then

    Fixed up thanks mate haha.

    Is that you Greg Very Happy ?
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    Mearcats

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Mearcats on Thu Apr 07, 2016 12:20 am

    As always, absolute gold HS! I now know how you've managed to boost your rep so high on this forum... Write funny shit like this! Anyone that doesn't give it the thumbs up has about as many chances of getting aroused by something as Stephen Hawkins does!
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    Honeysett
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Honeysett on Thu Apr 07, 2016 1:34 am

    Mearcats wrote:As always, absolute gold HS! I now know how you've managed to boost your rep so high on this forum... Write funny shit like this! Anyone that doesn't give it the thumbs up has about as many chances of getting aroused by something as Stephen Hawkins does!

    Haha I'll pay that, I do it for the people!
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    Finch

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Finch on Thu Apr 07, 2016 5:11 am

    I cant get excited about Broncos/Dragons tonight. I just feel every game the Dragons are involved in is just boring.
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    Liverpool_Bulldog

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Liverpool_Bulldog on Thu Apr 07, 2016 5:22 am

    Might trade in Matulino just because HS said he would score a try.
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    Sashamaloo

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Sashamaloo on Thu Apr 07, 2016 6:21 am

    Dylan walker hahaha
    Bryce Cartwright hahaha

    Fantastic reading, I checked fanatics site so many times last night hoping for the write ups to be done, alas I had to wake up this morning for them. Well done.

    Just out of interest how many of your tips have you got right?
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    GreenMachine

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by GreenMachine on Thu Apr 07, 2016 6:50 am

    LOL
    Laughing

    Just for interest mate track % tip strikerate at top of your article.
    Maybe even a units balance for having 1 unit bet on every selection using Sportsbet odds

    I know that's not the point of this but I actually really like your mail as well. I agree with the couple you think will be spankings and also that he Knights will get their breakthrough win. Good luck!

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Guest on Thu Apr 07, 2016 6:53 am

    Im surprised this hasn't received more likes yet. Best one yet IMO. Funny shit.

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Guest on Thu Apr 07, 2016 6:55 am

    FTS Bird? Which one? Laughing
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    ryno_

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by ryno_ on Thu Apr 07, 2016 8:07 am

    Hope the Tigpies get belted so you get your peri-peri.
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    No Worries
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by No Worries on Thu Apr 07, 2016 8:37 am

    Anyone else concerned he tells his bitches to "spreadit wide and score" then goes on to call his sister a bitch ??
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    bluetige

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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by bluetige on Thu Apr 07, 2016 9:41 am

    that's the first time I read a match thread and its better then any media ones. I'll be back for next weeks for sure, well done Honeysett
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    Honeysett
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Honeysett on Thu Apr 07, 2016 10:16 am

    Your Name wrote:Anyone else concerned he tells his bitches to "spreadit wide and score" then goes on to call his sister a bitch  ??

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    Honeysett
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    Re: Round 6 Match Thread

    Post by Honeysett on Thu Apr 07, 2016 10:20 am

    Sashamaloo wrote:Dylan walker hahaha
    Bryce Cartwright hahaha

    Fantastic reading, I checked fanatics site so many times last night hoping for the write ups to be done, alas I had to wake up this morning for them. Well done.

    Just out of interest how many of your tips have you got right?

    I'm currently 25/40. Pretty shocking. First try scorers even worse, honestly it's not worth me putting up units unless I add in the bets I would make. I do line bets or margin bets more than anything.

    @bren J Bird mate

      Current date/time is Mon Sep 25, 2017 5:53 pm