Round 4 Match Thread

Honeysett's Round 4 Match Thread



Controversy surrounded the corresponding fixture this time last year, like asking for a Coke and getting Pepsi it’s not something you soon forget. A Rey won’t have to worry about James Graham trying to snap his leg as he’s still nursing a broken jaw but that doesn’t mean the refs are safe. Caveman Klemmer needs to pull his head in and avoid the refs because there will be a lot of talk this week about it. You would think this game could come down to a field goal late again, enter Greg Inglis. Geography wasn’t his thing and it appears neither is simple Mathematics. Fucking spastic. The SCG reminded me of a squirting ex girlfriend so hopefully the wetness stays away and we can watch a great game of football. The crowd should be a massive George Burgess and the game is a really a tough one to call. Thankfully the 40 inch neck of Sam Burgess doesn’t have any serious injury and will likely only miss the week, although wouldn’t surprise me to see him be a late inclusion. I won’t toss a coin because my new age wallet doesn’t have a coin compartment so it has to sit loosely with the cash where it inevitably will drop out somewhere.

FTS: Gray
Dogs by 2.  



It’s the Grand Final Rematch! Some have called it the greatest grand final of all time, they’re all QLDers but they’re very vocal. The Cowboys just embarrassed the Roosters belting them 40-0 (the scoreline that will have all of Manly at full sail) they looked impressive while the Broncos struggled away from home to the Penny Panthers and on a Saturday losing to the new kid on campus. You would think that the Broncos will attempt to bounce back from their average performance on the weekend. Back on the same bat time on the same bat channel will give the Broncos back some familiarity, like the same old boring missionary sex most of you poor old bastards are having every other month. The Broncos rarely lose back to back but with Ben Hunt likely not sleeping all week in the buildup to this match due to Vietnam style flashbacks of dropping that bomb, that lead to that field goal, that lead to that grand final loss. JT will kick the goal from the sideline this time to sink the Broncos.

FTS: Milf
Cowboys by 8



Canberra drawing with Newcastle will go down as one of the upsets of the season, the Green Machine will be disappointed to top points to a team so shit. They’ve shown they’ve got the ability to pile on the points when they’re in the mood and as long as Sticky pulls his fingers out and stops playing an English second rower in the 6 for no fucking reason they’ll do away with the Titans. I honestly cannot explain the Titans, they’re such an enigma this year - they belted the Tigers, played well against the Storm and thrashed the Knights so there’s a mixed baggy there. One thing I will say about them, they inspired my liney lineys Saturday night so kudos to them for that. At some point this is all going to go to shit for the Titans, eventually. Surely. The Titans will want to leave with the two points but I think they’ll only leave with a handful of porn, a runny nose and 14 reasons to never visit Canberra again

FTS: Papa
Canberra by 14



Is there a team in worse shape at the moment than the Roosters? George Rose has better shape. They lack any type of go forward and can’t stop forwards running through them, their young halves aren’t stepping up like they should be in place of Dick In Dyke. They’ve got one of the best coaches in the game and he will need to be to sort out this rabble. Seriously their style of play looks like a pitbull chewing on mayonnaise. They will struggle to win a game until the calvary kids come back. The Sea Eagles will be without Taupau and Lawrence this week after thinking they were the Diaz brothers. How Taupau got the same sentence as Keiran Foran shows what amateur hour this code is sometimes. We want to stamp this sort of shit out of the game, what would you be more worried with? Your son putting his hand on the ref when he talks to him or knocking a kid senseless with a swinging arm. I know the bogan rednecks would probably applaud that type of behaviour but we here at NFF think that’s rubbish. Taupau is a cat, only I won’t ever say it to his face only ever behind a computer screen and even then I would blame it on someone else, the cunt scares me. As long as Willame isn’t playing the Sea Eagles go back to back in a huge reversal of their form in the first two games.

FTS T Turbo
Manly by 12



Both teams were lucky to win last week, they played against opposition will below their normal standards. The Dragons had the fortune of playing in knee deep water which suited their slow, plodding, skill free footy. I’ve seen faster build up watching the Lord of the Rings. Seen better tackling in curling. There’s better finishing from Anne Frank. The Red V also known as womans monthly is exactly how they’ll end up. Irrational, ill-tempted and generally a cunt to support. Te Maire Martin, TMM, remember the name. He sank the ponies and with the return of Moylan imminent the Panthers have some of the best juniors running around. Get rid of Spina Bifida and they’ll be a force to reckon with. Moylan, Sweet and Sowie, TMM and Seggy would be pretty imposing. Panthers will get the points here in one of those games you could skip, you know the type, you sit down and have a few beers. Your missus’s is cleaning the house and as she’s finishing up she’s a little toey, if it was a blockbuster game you’d tell her to set it to vibrate and finish herself off but this game you’d give her one while the going is good.

FTS DWZ
Panthers by 8



1/12 - the completion rate of the first half from either team? The chances either team make the 8 this year? No. One point from twelve possible between the both of these teams. They’ve both been completely lacklustre to start the year. You could forgive the Knights because they’re rebuilding and giving their youngsters some good game time for the future, but the Warriors? My god. They couldn’t win a meat raffle (sorry that’s a poor analogy, that’s ridiculously hard to win. Always fucking a few numbers before mine, just come to my fucking table before you go to them and I might win it for once you junkie fuckwit) The Knights had pretty good go forward when Pauli Pauli came on, the man so nice they named him twice so if that continues it could be interesting. If you’re a betting man stay the fuck away from this game, the Knights are capable of pulling off an upset, the Warriors have it in them to put 50 on them. This could really be a clusterfuck of epic proportions. You’d get more value at a strip club, at least then you might get some reliable league goss.

FTS: SJ
Warriors by 20



THUD. Right back where we thought they would be at the start of the season. The Titans gave them a touch up like they were Rolf Harris. They’ll need to be a lot better if they’re going to stop the Eels and the Semi Trailer, I had a shocker last week with the predictions but one thing I nailed was Radrada scoring a brace and getting back to form. All the talk this week was about whether they should let him play for NSW, just let him play for the Eels and let them make the 8. They’re looking like specials at this stage. Foran is great at steering the side around but I think their no names are the reason they’re surprising a few people. Tigers get Farah back so look for his nooooose to get in everything in doesn’t belong. My advice to Farah is pass the ball to the kids and stay the fuck out of the way but knowing the walking ego of the Lebanese Legend I doubt that will happen. He’ll ruin more plays than a cockblocking fem-nazi.

FTS Semi
Eels by 10



Grey Nurses masquerading as Great Whites on Monday Night, they still don’t know how to score when they’re inside - very limp dicked. You can have all the go forward in the world but if your halves can’t get the ball to the right people you’re not going to win the close games. On a personal note to James Maloney. Ahem. Stop fucking dummying to Wade Graham you dunce fuck, he’s a gun and you don’t use him as a decoy runner. Barba looks like he is getting back to his best, hanging out with his EBC again must have his head in the right place (probably between some sluts legs but who am I to judge) The Storm continues to roll on, Martina Navratilova knows how to get it done, he does it every year and coaches the team to perfection. Watching the Storm roll in to Shark Park should be a great way to finish Easter Monday, I’ll be comatose on the couch and probably still crying into a bowl of Ben n Jerrys over the Knights. Koro will score a brace and Munster will continue to prove he’s the future of the Storm. They’ll JUST beat the Sharks.

FTS Koro
Storm by 4.